overheard conversation at able baker that i wish i hadn't heard

I had never heard of it or thought about it in that context at all. I also have never seen anything by Charlie Chan. I would imagine this isn't quite the universal understanding you think. I don't think I've ever said "me likey" either but I certainly will be sure never to in the future.

Isn't possible that sometimes a y is just a y?

If the girl didn't hear these men talking about her, then why is it anyone elses business but theirs how they speak with each other?

tjohn said:

Look, you can't put a positive spin on the comments these guys made about, I'm guessing, a teenage girl.  Don't even try.  

alex4855 said:

togetherness said:

like-y - as in old fashioned racist trope.

and alex, you need to check your attacks at the door.

Oh boy.

togetherness said:

like-y - as in old fashioned racist trope.

and alex, you need to check your attacks at the door.

I'm buying coffee for these guys tomorrow... see you there if you care!

These posts, trying to convict some guys on comments made on what someone overheard being said about another person unidentified.  Great post- bs.  Ciao bella.

hoops said:

Isn't possible that sometimes a y is just a y?

If the girl didn't hear these men talking about her, then why is it anyone elses business but theirs how they speak with each other?

Certainly, some things are not meant to be overheard.  But if you involuntarily overhear something, I suppose you can say something.

tjohn said:

hoops said:

Isn't possible that sometimes a y is just a y?

If the girl didn't hear these men talking about her, then why is it anyone elses business but theirs how they speak with each other?

Certainly, some things are not meant to be overheard.  But if you involuntarily overhear something, I suppose you can say something.

Agreed.. not hidden behind a bs post.   My point exactly.

alex4855 said:

These posts, trying to convict some guys on comments made on what someone overheard being said about another person unidentified.  Great post- bs.  I side with the "old guys" - clearly there is a deep bias in the thinking here.  

What's the deep bias?  Maybe because I have daughters or maybe because I have been around softball for a few years, I expect grown men to behave like fathers around teenage girls.

EBennett said:

Why do the ages matter on either side?  The comment was inappropriate and sexist.  

Give it a break.

georgieboy said:

EBennett said:

Why do the ages matter on either side?  The comment was inappropriate and sexist.  

Give it a break.

When I'm at the pool I can't help but notice some of the lifeguards. But I have enough decency to not make pervy comments out loud and also recognize that ogling a man who is less than half my age is something I shouldn't be broadcasting. I don't think it is out of line to expect men to be able to also pretend to be civil when checking someone out. Most everyone has taken a look at least once in their life and thought "damn I'd like to have a piece of that," but some of us are able to keep it to ourselves. 

So, if you were sitting with a friend, you would never say to her, "oooh, that guy's really hot"?  Never?

I'm sensitive to the idea of keeping juvenile sexist comments out of earshot of anyone who might be offended,  but its not realistic to think friends will refrain from acting this way among themselves.  And I'm not just talking guys either.  We are in the age of Amy Schumer.    

Hey, look, it's another stupid MOL thread. 

bub said:

I'm sensitive to the idea of keeping juvenile sexist comments out of earshot of anyone who might be offended,  but its not realistic to think friends will refrain from acting this way among themselves.  And I'm not just talking guys either.  We are in the age of Amy Schumer.    

Key words being "out of earshot of anyone".

imonlysleeping said:

Hey, look, it's another stupid MOL thread. 

As opposed to.....

conandrob240 said:

So, if you were sitting with a friend, you would never say to her, "oooh, that guy's really hot"?  Never?

Indeed, and as far as "guy talk" goes, this was pretty tame.

tjohn said:

bub said:

I'm sensitive to the idea of keeping juvenile sexist comments out of earshot of anyone who might be offended,  but its not realistic to think friends will refrain from acting this way among themselves.  And I'm not just talking guys either.  We are in the age of Amy Schumer.    

Key words being "out of earshot of anyone".

Agreed.  In fact, if I'm with a friend and a noteworthy attractive person goes by, we usually wouldn't need to anything but rather take note by way of subtle eye gestures (or worst case, another form of non-verbal communication, such as like Lenny & Squiggy in the opening credit sequence....).

conandrob240 said:

So, if you were sitting with a friend, you would never say to her, "oooh, that guy's really hot"?  Never?

If he is less than half my age, and by coincidence the same age as my friend's son, then no, I wouldn't say something like that. 

weirdbeard said:

Agreed.  In fact, if I'm with a friend and a noteworthy attractive person goes by, we usually wouldn't need to anything but rather take note by way of subtle eye gestures (or worst case, another form of non-verbal communication, such as like Lenny & Squiggy in the opening credit sequence....).

Exactly.  That is the hallmark of civilization.

As Earl Long said:

Don't write anything you can phone. Don't phone anything you can talk. Don't talk anything you can whisper. Don't whisper anything you can smile. Don't smile anything you can nod. Don't nod anything you can wink. 

http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/e/earllong212427.html

Life would be intolerable if at all times we had to conform to some sanitized ideal of behavior.  I say irreverent crude things to my wife, to my friends, to my young adult children that I would never say in mixed company.    

bub said:

Life would be intolerable if at all times we had to conform to some sanitized ideal of behavior.  I say irreverent crude things to my wife, to my friends, to my young adult children that I would never say in mixed company.    

But are you comfortable with some "old man" perving on your young daughter?

I'm not comfortable with anyone, including myself, making anyone else uncomfortable, although given the varied sensibilities in the world, I'm not sure that can be helped.  I'm not sure what your definition of "perving" is.  If, for example, you're talking about the passing on the street backward glance (I'm guilty), I think my daughter, who is pretty tough, can live with the though that men and perhaps some women do that to her.       

marylago said:

bub said:

Life would be intolerable if at all times we had to conform to some sanitized ideal of behavior.  I say irreverent crude things to my wife, to my friends, to my young adult children that I would never say in mixed company.    

But are you comfortable with some "old man" perving on your young daughter?

Of course not. There are rules that men must follow when commenting on the appearance of a woman. 

1) Be attractive

2) Be handsome

3) Don't be unattractive

I don't care if he is attractive or handsome, I don't want some random stranger making comments about my looks out loud as though I were an object. 

I think this post is a complete BS post.   I heard a couple of women talking about a Spanish ( from Spain) male au pair coming to Maplewood this summer- "so hot, gorgeous- look at that!  He can use our pool anytime!"    Oh, so insulted- bs.

imonlysleeping said:

Hey, look, it's another stupid MOL thread. 

Every day MOL gets more and more like Swap/SOMA Lounge.

LOL

RobB said:

marylago said:

bub said:

Life would be intolerable if at all times we had to conform to some sanitized ideal of behavior.  I say irreverent crude things to my wife, to my friends, to my young adult children that I would never say in mixed company.    

But are you comfortable with some "old man" perving on your young daughter?

Of course not. There are rules that men must follow when commenting on the appearance of a woman. 

1) Be attractive

2) Be handsome

3) Don't be unattractive

I am a bad feminist. I don't take the actions I should to ensure that my daughters and my daughter's daughters aren't treated as objects, but I take umbrage to the idea that it's okay to comment on a woman if you're attractive. And women should not be objectifying men. It's not right. But many comments here are from men. You most likely don't know the fear of walking alone, even in broad daylight, wondering what will happen because of what you wear or just because you're a woman. I have lost much of that fear since I am older but I certainly hear about it from my daughters. It's disgraceful. Women are people...

alex4855 said:

I think this post is a complete BS post.   I heard a couple of women talking about a Spanish ( from Spain) male au pair coming to Maplewood this summer- "so hot, gorgeous- look at that!  He can use our pool anytime!"    Oh, so insulted- bs.

Which post do you think is complete BS?  The original post or your "I heard women talking ..." post?

marylago said:

RobB said:

marylago said:

bub said:

Life would be intolerable if at all times we had to conform to some sanitized ideal of behavior.  I say irreverent crude things to my wife, to my friends, to my young adult children that I would never say in mixed company.    

But are you comfortable with some "old man" perving on your young daughter?

Of course not. There are rules that men must follow when commenting on the appearance of a woman. 

1) Be attractive

2) Be handsome

3) Don't be unattractive

I am a bad feminist. I don't take the actions I should to ensure that my daughters and my daughter's daughters aren't treated as objects, but I take umbrage to the idea that it's okay to comment on a woman if you're attractive. And women should not be objectifying men. It's not right. But many comments here are from men. You most likely don't know the fear of walking alone, even in broad daylight, wondering what will happen because of what you wear or just because you're a woman. I have lost much of that fear since I am older but I certainly hear about it from my daughters. It's disgraceful. Women are people...

+++1

marylago said: ...

http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/be-attractive-dont-be-unattractive?full=1

It's from a SNL sexual harassment video featuring Tom Brady.

RobB said:

marylago said: ...

http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/be-attractive-dont-be-unattractive?full=1


It's from a SNL sexual harassment video featuring Tom Brady.

You know sexual harassment is not a joke, right?