Caretaking 102 - The Aftermath
Joan, I have a light-weight portable wheelchair that you're welcome to use as long as you need it. It folds up easily to fit in the trunk of a car. It's grubby from sitting unused in the basement for years, and I'm out of town so can't clean it, but if you can use it I can get it delivered to your house.
Joan, 'small sips' is often why people are given cups of ice chips when in hospital or rehab; as the ice melts, you get a cup of water. Personally, I'm not a fan, because it's not thirst-quenching and also the water temperature is an issue for me.
I'm wondering if you might substituting thin broth/bouillon or even jello may be a suitable inclusion to help with some of that fluids intake? I remember my diabetic mother sipping a mid-morning 'snack' of vegie broth with a small cracker, and we used to make her all kinds of savoury and fruit-based gels with agar sheets, water and the flavouring ( home made chicken broth, or apple juice, etc).
Joan, I'm so glad Bernie is home and in somewhat better spirits. It's beyond belief that the facility simply could not get its act together and provide adequate and appropriate treatment. I'm so sorry... 
I so hope he gets on track with his recovery and that you get the help you need. Make sure to give yourself breaks when you get someone in you can trust to leave with him for an hour. You are going to need some breathing space now and then. Remember not to burn yourself out!
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So glad he's home!
Friends, in case you didn't see this on the helping hands site:
Ride to St. Barnabas Needed!
Joan and Bernie need a ride to/from the Ostomy Center St. Barnabas on Tuesday, Oct. 13 for a visit at 12:30 pm. Can be one or both directions.
Pickup: 11:45 at their house. Allowing extra time to help him to the car.
Return: Not sure so if you can be on call any time after 1:15, Joan can call you when the visit is over.
Not sure if he will have a wheelchair so, to be safe, it would be best for someone with a large enough car to accommodate a wheelchair.
If you are free, please let me know. Thank you!
Also...someone wrote me that St Barnabas can provide rides and Medicare pays for it. I've lost the note though...can you reshare information
Red Cross also provides low-cost/no cost patient transport services for many communities, it might be worth checking to see if it's something they might do in your area. Usually a volunteer driver is arranged (has first aid quals, and some carer training), and a care coordinator can be assigned if required. It's not a well-publicised service.
They also offer a carer support service consisting of a daily or weekly phone call, usually about 5 mins, just to check all is well and you're coping OK. When you're not, a full range of support services kick in, as appropriate.
Joan just messaged that Bernie is back in St. Barnabas ICU. Everyone, please send your prayers and strength to them both. Will update asap.
Oh no!! So sorry to hear this, prayers and wishes for strength and energy sent.
Wishing this weren't happening. Prayers and good thoughts for Joan and Bernie.
Thank you all. A relative has offered to go with me to see him this morning. I will extend all of your wishes to him then. Your kind concern means so much to both of us.
7:30 am report: Awake alert, watching TV. Like Tinkerbell, Bernie is rallying to all the prayers and pvs that have been coming his way. Please keep them coming. They are working a miracle.
I'm so glad and relieved to hear that, Joan. Thinking positive thoughts for both of you and hoping Bernie can come home soon.
So glad to hear of improvement. Will keep positive thoughts flowing for Bernie and you
Still praying for Tinkerbell. But he's probably gonna be kinda mad when he hears people calling him that... 
I couldn't resist making a joke about it, but that is not to say I don't find this news very cheering! And I think the image is adorable.
Condition has deteriorated from earlier phone message. I went hoping to to the ICU expecting to find sitting up cheerfully in bed. Such was not the case. I was advised to not try and see him for a few days. More of us have to believe more strongly in fairies.
Joan, just curious who advised you not to see Bernie for a few days? Since he is in ICU, you should have pretty liberal visiting periods although they may be short, unless it is too upsetting for you. Thinking of you both. So sorry condition has deteriorated since this earlier this morning, must have been quite a shock.
Is Bernie in isolation for infection? Is that why they suggested limiting visits? Hard to understand why they would say that. Wishing you strength
I second the comment by mod. Seems an unusual request. You alone should be exempt from exclusion as your husband will sense that you are not there and your presence has been a significant part of his recovery. I would ask the reason behind the hospital's directive.
Prayers.
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We were able to get the antibiotics in time for his next dose. Pharmacy called when they got it in from another pharmacy. My son was able to pick it up.
A wheel chair was delivered this afternoon. My son took the old ramp from the garage that was built for me when I had my accident so we can get him in and out of the house more easily. I am not sure how long he will need the wheel chair but it will serve as a valued back-up until I can get him on his feet again.
He is much more lucid than he was in the facility but so very tired. I don't think he got much sleep while he was there and I know he got little socialization.
My daughter-in-law the RN stopped by after work to check things out and make sure we had all the additional medications he needed and understood how to use them. I was very happy for her visit.
He is more willing to drink liquid but is still producing less urine that he should. We are working on getting him hydrated without contributing to the bloating. DIL suggested smaller sips more frequently.